shrek script no spaces

DONKEY: But, uh, I don't have any friends. Shrek climbs to the top of a tree, using his weight to cause the tree to bend over the river and form a bridge. FIONA: Now you hold still, and I'll yank this thing out. I saw this flower and thought of you because it's pretty and-- well, I don't really like it but I thought you might like it 'cause you're pretty. You could recite an epic poem for me. FIONA: You just tell her she's not your true love. He gestures at the skeleton of a knight laying against the wall, a charred outline of a man burned into the stone behind it. Donkey gasps and makes eye contact with Shrek. The force of the spell blows against the crowd and all the windows. Shrek stares at Fiona in astonishment, and then grins. Several of the characters from the movie made their way into the musical, but that doesn't mean they all stayed the same. Well then who was she talking about? The crowd gasps and goes silent. A group of birds flocks out the top of the roof, startling Donkey. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. THE CAPTAIN: Five shillings for the possessed toy. FIONA: Mirror, mirror, show her to me. Fiona smacks her reflection in the water, which splashes water onto Donkey. Farquaad grabs ahold of his crown and puts it on. Good night. shrek script no spaces. Now kiss me! Shrek lets out a loud belch. Don't let them do this! (his nose grows). Shrek Script {Man} Once upon a time there was a lovely princess. The mirror shows a portrait of Snow White in her slumber. (continues to bounce and sway as he backs Donkey across the bridge). Should it not be a wonderful, romantic moment? SHREK: (sigh) Okay, fine. Suddenly it was all clear to Donkey. The group comes to a river with no path across, though it is clearly shallow enough to walk over. SHREK: Maybe you can come visit me in the swamp sometime. -This little wooden puppet. The abandoned windmill is filed with shadows and cobwebs. FIONA: No! In the past, humans worried about beasts and godlike forces, but you don't need to fear starvation when you have grocery stores. He bends down over Fiona and she puckers her lips. The trees and grass are neatly cut and the rows of houses all looked exactly the same. I like that boulder. It didn't come off no stone neither. DONKEY: Blue flower, red thorns. Put me down! Onions have layers. Fear's a sensible response to an unfamiliar situation. Suddenly the pulley comes loose and Shrek starts falling. She looks down and spots the sunflower left by the door. Dragon swoops down and swallows him up in one gulp. DONKEY: Ha-ha-ha! What are you doing? SHREK: Yeah, sorry, lady. SHREK: Sure, it's big enough, but look at the location. FARQUAAD: This hocus-pocus alters nothing! The church is packed with citizens. She reaches down, squeezing Donkey's face. Thelonius takes one of the cards and writes 'Awwww' on the back and shows it to the congregation. He does. Look, I'm an animal, and I got instincts. DONKEY: All right, all right. FARQUAAD: She's married to the muffin man A door opens and the Captain of the Duloc Guards steps in. Donkey catches up to Shrek as he his walking away. DONKEY: (sniffs) Ohh! MIRROR: Just kiss her dead, frozen lips and find out what a live wire she is.! DONKEY: Go ahead, have some fun. Thank you very much! DONKEY: Okay, okay, I see it now. DONKEY: Hey, where you goin'? That's bad. But the wall's supposed to go around my swamp, not through it. DONKEY: Can I say something to you? (Smacks Donkey again) Talk, you boneheaded dolt, talk! Oh! DONKEY: (chuckes along nervously) Uh, Shrek? Though a bit startled, she is ecstatic to see her knight-in-shining armor. Shrek turns to leave and Fiona quickly sits upright. Not by some ogre and hihihis pet. Shrek's confused look turns into a big grin. MIRROR: Bachelorette number two is a cape-wearing girl from the land of fancy. Those waiting in line include Peter Pan, who is carrying Tinkerbell in a cage, Geppetto who is carrying Pinocchio, and a farmer carrying the Three Little Pigs. And so on and so forth. Now it's my turn! Fiona is lowered to the ground and Shrek runs up to her. Farquaad holds Fiona's hand, puckers his lips, and leans toward her. Donkey steps outside and talks to himself. DONKEY: Oh y'know I'd, I'd really love to stay, but -- (Dragon tugs at Donkey's tail with her mouth). Shrek heaves a deep sigh. But you only look like this at night. The Script: https://imsdb.com/scripts/Shrek.html Amazon Music Unlimited FREE 30 DAYS: http://www.getamazonmusic.com/RAZZLE GUESTS Grant Turner: ht. Her look turns from nervousness to bemusement, and she awkwardly smiles. SHREK: Oh you can't tell me you're afraid of heights. After opening at No. DONKEY: Okay, so here's another question. Fiona, my love, we're but a kiss away from our "happily ever after." He sees that a horde of fairytale creatures have set up camp in his swamp. She straightens her dress, lays back down, and then quickly reaches over for bouquet of flowers off the side table. Fiona and Farquaad are standing at the altar as the priest conducts the ceremony. Captain of the Guards: Next! FIONA: It's the only way to break the spell. Shrek grabs Fiona once again and takes off running towards the direction of the dragon's roar. MONSIEUR HOOD: I steal from the rich and give to the needy. Farquaad looks down and pulls the sheet up to cover himself as the covers rise. SHREK: Okay, you two, head for the exit! Oh, no, No! Shrek turns around and sees that the Seven Dwarves have put Snow White, sleeping in her glass coffin, on the table. Donkey crashes into a pile of knight remains, knocking over a skeleton whose helmet lands on Donkey's head. He sighs and walks off. SHREK: So, um, what did Fiona say about me? Shrek uses the ropes to launch himself at two knights, knocking them over with his arms. No! Shrek angrily fights back and knocks out a few of the guards, but they are able to subdue him through sheer numbers. Cakes have layers. DONKEY: You know, I do too. SHREK: You know, she's right. I think I need a hug. DONKEY: You know what? Thank you! She breathes a sigh of relief. The swamp is a mess but the fairytale creatures are gone. SHREK: All right! Farquaad lays in bed with the Magic Mirror set up at the foot of the bed. Oh, this? SHREK: Donkey, two things, okay? The dragon appears to be flattered by Donkey's compliments. I heard the two of you talking. The Captain of the Duloc Guards sits at a table paying a line of people their rewards for turning in the fairytale creatures. DONKEY: Whoa! Calm down! Ha, ha! Donkeys don't have layers. Turn your head and cough! Hours have passed and Fiona has calmed down. Shrek runs for the cathedral doors but Donkey hurries to get in his way. DONKEY: You know what else everybody likes? DONKEY: I would think, of all people, you would recognize a wall when you see one. Princess, I've brought you a little something. Donkey rips a flower off a nearby bush, which happens to be a blue flower with red thorns, and takes off running. SHREK: Oh, yeah! and hauls her out of bed and towards the door. His eyes cross and as he reaches the bottom of the slide, he groans and stumbles off. I put up signs. And I'm not goin' out there by myself. The Captain tucks tail and runs off. I ain't saying anything. Donkey and Shrek are now walking through the fields heading away from Duloc. Give me another chance! MIRROR: Bachelorette number one is a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, far away. FARQUAAD: Ugh! He sees several shadows moving and looks around. Donkey wakes up with a yawn as the guards march by. This is good. What a load of -. FIONA: Sure. SHREK Oh, come on! DONKEY: But that's it. You're, uhuhehdifferent. You got that kind of "I-don't-care-what-nobody-thinks-of-me" thing. DONKEY: Ohh! The sooner, the better. (jumps down to the table). I've heard enough. SHREK: No, that'll take longer. You handle the dragon. Magnitude. Suddenly the chandelier jerks Dragon back, the sword having lodged itself into a stone column and getting the chain stuck. Donkey drops to the floor to avoid another fireball, which manages to singe the tuft of his tail. I would'st look upon the face of my rescuer. SHREK: Oh, yeah? Donkey: Oh, OK. All right, cool. FIONA: Hey, wait. DONKEY: You are mean to me! SHREK: Ah, that's not very nice (Looks at Donkey and then back at Farquaad). Farquaad drops his weapon and looks up. DONKEY: Hey, that is unwanted physical contact. Donkey is frozen with fear, unable to tell who the figure is. SHREK: What you're doing is the opposite of help. Oh, sure! That really made me feel good to see that. Woo, look at that! Yeah. He gets sprinkled with fairy dust and starts floating upwards. The villager mutters to himself. Get him! She begins backing up toward the windmill. Yours for the rescuing, Princess Fiona! FIONA: But wait, Sir Knight! DONKEY: I just know before this is over, I'm gonna need a whole lot of serious therapy. MIRROR: And last, but certainly not last, bachelorette number three is a fiery redhead from a dragon-guarded castle surrounded by hot boiling lava! You're always pushing me around or pushing me away. Shrek, now disguised as a knight in shining armor walks off further into the castle. There's so much to do! Shrek walks in another direction. Shrek tries to press on while Donkey tries to make his way back under Shrek. A ray of light shines down on a leather-bound storybook. You're just jealous that you can never measure up to a great ruler like Lord Farquaad. That was really scary. FIONA: Okay. Fiona looks at him in shock, tears welling in her eyes. Fiona stands with her arm on Shrek's, but Donkey butts in-between them. The villager drops it. FIONA: Look, pal, I don't know who you think you are! What do I have to do get a little privacy? Not there! A few minutes later, Shrek is rolling a large boulder away from the mouth of a cave. Shrek: Donkey! He comes to a halt. FARQUAAD: Oh, that is so sweet. Donkey begins to hum 'On the Road Again'. He sees the Three Blind Mice on his table. They are both startled by Donkey's interruption. FARQUAAD: Uh, Thelonius. They judge me before they even know me. No, no! Three! But, Shrek? Shrek grabs a sword lodged in the floor and sticks it through a link in the chain and deep into the floor. Fiona sheepishly smiles at Shrek. Farquaad gestures to the man with the prompter card holds up a card that says 'Laugh'. Walking through a field at sunset. Your welcome is officially worn out! As they reach the middle of the bridge the fire burns the bridge and it snaps in half. There's no time. Gasps are heard all around. You're not coming home with me. (He drops out of the air and hits the ground with a thud.). You don't have to waste good manners on the ogre. I'd step all over it. I'm still afraid of the dark. Not there! DONKEY: What's the matter with you? I like that. A bright fire shines on the screen and Farquaad covers his eyes. She wanders off into the woods, marveling at the nature, and begins to sing. You know what? Don't mess with me. Donkey and Shrek turn to each other and burst out laughing. Donkey trots over to Shrek as he kneels by the fire and fiddles with one of the spits. DONKEY: What did you do with the princess?! SHREK: I, um, I was wonderingare you(sighs) Are you gonna eat that? There is a montage of their journey. Take it away! I'm notnot emotionally ready for a commitment of, uh, this, uh - - "magnitude" really is the word I'm looking for. Listen, you was really, really, really somethin' back here. She looks up again to see Shrek stomping towards her. DONKEY: (trailing after Shrek) Oh, you both have layers. Fiona walks out of the cave and glances at Shrek and Donkey who are still sleeping. The whole congregation laughs. Everyone knows what happens when you find your Shrek cuts her off with a deliberate, bouncing readjustment. (Donkey hops up onto a chair.) DONKEY: Man, you almost burned the hair outta my nose, just like the time(Shrek covers his mouth but Donkey continues to talk, so Shrek removes his hand.) You can't breathe a word. Shrek yelps and jumps away. DONKEY: Oh, my God! Donkey sniffs the eggs and licks his lips. Donkey makes ready to run over and pull the lever again but Shrek quickly grabs him by the tail. SHREK: Oh, hey! SHREK: Okay! Shrek: You're bothering me. Dragon looks up at the chandelier hanging above them and gently lights its candles with her fire breath. The guard offers Fiona assistance, but she looks up onto the saddle on her own. I won't tell him. See ya later. FIONA: Oh, now you wanna talk? Shrek! They begin to sing along with Monsieur Hood. I wanted to show you before. Take a good look at me, Donkey. DONKEY: (Jumping up and down) Oh! Shrek hears a noise from inside and turns to find the source. SHREK: Let's just say I'm not your type, okay? That's the last thing on my mind. I can't breathe. Unsee by either of them, Fiona was peeking around the cave door, eavesdropping on the conversation. Shrek grins and gets up while Donkey is still crossing, launching him back to the other side. Shrek's ugly 24/7. All right then. That's just how it has to be. Shrek and Donkey look around the square, which is deserted. I'm makin' waffles. I don't want to rush into a a physical relationship. You have a very full day filling in for the King and Queen. GUARD: All right. SHREK: (holds up a mug of beer) Can't we just settle this over a pint? They forgive each other! Nothing seems to be wrong with Donkey. Hmm? You're great pals, aren't ya? SHREK Not fast enough. Help! Oh. Whoa! SHREK: Oh, I understand. Farquaad snaps his fingers and is lifted onto his horse by his guard. Fiona gives Shrek one last spiteful look. Good? I love Duloc, first of all. Standing at the height of four and a half feet, he is much shorter than Fiona. (Walks passed Donkey). They head off. SHREK: Why do you want to talk about it? (walks off). Shrek and Fiona walk down the aisle to their awaiting carriage, which is made of a giant onion. This be-ith our first meeting. SHREK: Look princess you're not making my job any easier. I will have perfection! SHREK: (Annoyed) Oh, that's great. SHREK: The stars don't tell the future, Donkey. Its 37000 characters no spaces lll try and find it. SHREK: Does anyone else know where to find him? Shrek wakes up, smells the foods, and takes note of Fiona. Dragon ends up in front of them and breathes fire. Farquaad chuckles then motions to the bishop to indulge Fiona. SHREK: So, that must be Lord Farquaad's castle. Parfaits. Please! In a field, Shrek swats away at a swarm of flies following him. I love it! I'll handle the stairs. SHREK: Look, I'm not the one with the problem, okay? Blue flower, red thorns. Who knows where this "Farquaad" guy is? Move it along. He looks down and picks up a wanted poster dropped by one of the villagers. Take love's true form.". Wake up and smell the pheromones. DONKEY: Really? Maybe I could have decapitated an entire village and put their heads on a pike, gotten a knife, cut open their spleen and drink their fluids. Now, if you two are such good friends, why don't you follow her home?! He continues on. I thought we was lookin' for the princess. Shrek is munching on an onion. The Duloc Knights draw their weapons and slowly approach Shrek as he backs up, the crowd cheering them on. You go back. Yes, that's it. DONKEY: I don't even wanna hear it. Uh, remember when you said that ogres have layers? SHREK: The wedding! Those stairs won't know which way they're goin'. OLD WOMAN: No, no! FIONA: Donkey! Shrek and Fiona cross the bridge connecting the tallest tower to the rest of the castle. The crowd gasps, but before he can make a move Shrek puts him in a full-nelson hold. (yanks the wreath off Donkey's head). Nobody! As Shrek and Donkey walk down the tunnel to get into the arena, Donkey hums the Duloc theme song. Her sad look turns to bitterness. As they walk away from the crowd Shrek grabs the torch from a dwarf cheering them on, who refuses to let go. Shrek regards the handkerchief curiously and wipes off his sooty face with it, blackening it. Shrek casually licks his fingers and pinches the flame, extinguishing the torch. Well was it something you ate? (Suggestively raises his eyebrows). Every night I become this. Ogres have layers! Shrek quietly pushes open the doors, stepping out onto a balcony of large spacious room. That one there? SHREK: Stop singing! my bad, he screamed the new testament of the bible. The music winds up and then the box doors open up. I can change. And that's when you say, "I object!". No! If you don't mind me sayin', if that don't work, your breath certainly will get the job done, 'cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs or something, 'cause your breath stinks! Both Donkey and Shrek's ears lower, taken aback by her outburst. (sigh) When I was a little girl, a witch cast a spell on me. By myself, outside. Now my patience has reached its end! Shrek turns and regards Donkey for a moment before loudly roaring in is face. Singing) "'Cause I'm all alone, There's no one here beside me, My problems have all gone, There's no one to deride me, But you gotta have friends". Couldn't have been the donkey. Shrek brushes the cloak onto the floor, while the birds come back to place a wreath of flowers on Donkey's head. How do you let her down real easy so her feelings aren't hurt, but you don't get burned to a crisp and eaten? Now I'm a flying, talking donkey. -Oh! You got something in your eye? Shrek: [Whispers] This is the part where you run away. Awful stuff. You rescued me! Donkey is talking to himself in his sleep. I'm scarier than anything we're going to see in this forest. FARQUAAD: Silence! Donkey falls asleep by the fire outside. How about that? -I'm not a puppet. Perched on a rock pinnacle, it was surrounded by a terrifying lake of molten lava. Fairy tale creatures." [Sighs] Guard 1: All right. (Thelonius holds up a hand mirror and smashes it with his fist.) She smiles and then continues walking, singing softly. FARQUAAD: Then what are you waiting for? SHREK: Example? Bye-bye. then I ate some rotten berries. That was amazing! Shrek and Donkey gaze out into the crater. But I'll let you do themeasuringwhen you see him tomorrow. The masked man is dunking what looks to be a small person into the glass of milk. The chain swings back and he is left dangling above her. FARQUAAD: PrincessFionashe's perfect. Farquaad seems even more pleased, and everyone else claps this time. It is the Magic Mirror. Donkey looks nervous, but Shrek and Fiona give him reassuring looks. PINOCCHIO: I'm not a puppet. Dragon picks him up by the tail in her mouth and happily carries him off. Shrek looks up and spots that the chain is jammed above him. LITTLE BEAR: (crying) This cage is too small. She tries to sneak away, but a wood plank breaks and she falls down with a crash. A limerick? 3. DONKEY: Princess? DONKEY: So, uh, are there any donkeys up there? DONKEY: Princess? Well, guess what! Shrek uses a folding chair to smack the knight lying on the ground. Nothing would make--. Keep your legs elevated! I was talkin' to you. Onions have layers. This is not dignified! Do you want to sit down? But you should. Although she lives with seven other men, she's not easy. DONKEY: Why don't you want to talk about it? FIONA: I can't just marry whoever I want. Shrek and Fiona ride away in their carriage. (Advancing toward her) I'm a delivery boy. Shrek looks at Donkey for a second and then reaches to move the boulder back in front of the entrance. Man those guards! FIONA: I'm sorry, but your job is not my problem. GINGERBREAD MAN: God bless us, every one. I swear! This is the transcript for the 2001 film, Shrek. (The pixie dust's effects begin to wear off) Uh-oh. Before sunset. FARQUAAD: Very well, ogre. You're a mean, green, fightin' machine. DONKEY: Oh, come on, Shrek. He reads it aloud. SHREK: You don't have to tell me anything, princess. FIONA: Oh, no. Really. Gender-Swapping. I will make this Princess Fiona my queen, and Duloc will finally have the perfect king! Everyone stands in awe. All right, hop on and hold on tight. Don't die Shrek. SHREK: I'm sorry. DONKEY: Princess, how 'bout if you don't marry Farquaad? Now -- now remove your helmet. "Princess" and "ugly" don't go together. Fiona leans over a barrel filled with water, looking at her reflection. 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